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Why was the homeowner scared of the zombies at his front door?

They were dead ringers of friends of his.

1277

How do you describe a cow that is very particular about the food it eats?

It chooses its cud.

473

What type of granite is always red?

A pomegranate.

2752

Why did the family's credit card debt get so large that they had to file for bankrupcy?

Because it was a house of cards.

1420

Why should you take a sharp pencil seriously?

It has a good point.

1762

What do you call a pair of pants that wants to be forever young?

Peter pants.

312

Why did Beverly avoid bidding too much at auctions?

She thought it might be considered morbid.

1108

What is the space over a spinning top called?

It's over the top.

665

If Fairly Dickinson University provides undergraduate degrees, what is their graduate school called?

Very Dickinson

483

If the Allentown bank merged with Capital One bank, what would it be called?

Al Capone.

122

Where did Melinda keep information about doctors and medicine?

In her 'docs' folder on her computer.

1129

What part of the meat did Bill try not to bring to his wife from the freezer?

He didn't think it was a good idea to give his wife the cold shoulder.

1964