Pictures:

Shane Ronay
General
Picture

What do you call someone who believes only 12.5% in a Universal Being?

An eighth-iest

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Akiva Lane
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What is someone called who lies about how much he eats?

Dish-onest.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Fred spend a lot of time looking around the horse stable?

His therapist said his life should be more stable eyes'd.

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Akiva Lane
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What liquid is able to run?

Running water.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Mike concerned about the liquids that he drank?

Because after he drank them, they were drunk.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a family that has generations of restaurants?

A dine-asty.

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Shane Ronay
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Picture

What do you call someone with no capacity at all for gardening?

A blooming idiot.

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Shane Ronay
General
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Why did Bill order these to wear himself?

He's trying to lose weight through resistance-training.

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Akiva Lane
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Picture

What is it called when a prisoner sends a text message?

Con-text.

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Akiva Lane
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What was done wrong here?

Someone put all their eggs in one basket.

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Akiva Lane
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Why are lawyers happy?

Because they're always dealing with parties.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the people playing poker surround themselves with bushes?

They wanted to hedge their bets.

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