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What did Arnie lose, that made him unable to speak?

He lost his voice.

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Why did Bill often get angry easily?

He went around with a chip on his shoulder.

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What song is encouraging to the letter C?

Oh say can you C?

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What do you call a state that is really into dancing?

A swing state.

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Why was the plumber scared to unclog bathroom sinks?

It was always a hair-raising experience.

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What did they say about the king who was only 12 inches tall?

He was an excellent ruler.

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When Jim made a party on his yacht, why did he try not to invite too many people?

He didn't want to go overboard.

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What is an expert thief who is second in command called?

An accomplished accomplice.

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What time did Jimmy eat 30 peanuts?

8:30

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What do you call an eating contest to see who can eat the fastest?

The gulp war.

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What has one eye, no mouth, and everyone agrees that it always makes a good point.

A needle.

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Why are bakery employees so nice to their customers?

They know where their bread is buttered.

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