Pictures:

What do you call a demonstration at a diner?

A counter-demonstration.

2149

How did Phil become such an expert at bumper cars?

He took a crash course.

868

How can you hold air?

By holding your breath.

275

What did Jim call his life after he decided not to major in math?

The aftermath.

1285

Which hospital uses high-fat condiments to cure diseases?

The Mayo Clinic

1001

What will happen if the San Andreas Fault causes an earthquake?

It will be covered by no-fault insurance.

607

What happens to dairy cows when they die?

They get CREAMated.

1059

Why do horses tend to get along well with each other?

They have stable relationships.

1895

What do you call an alligator who is a detective?

An investigator.

94

What is it called when an iceberg gives a waiter a nice tip?

The tip of the iceberg.

2439

What time is this?

A quarter after 5.

2727

If a leader doesn't have a clear inspiring vision, what is the result?

Di-vision.

250