Pictures:

What do you call aluminum foil that misbehaves and has too much power?

Alumi-naughty.

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Why are Persians good forecastors of future events?

Because they can far see (Farsi).

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What happened to the marionette puppet that misbehaved at school?

It was suspended.

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What happened to Bill?

He tripped while he was on a trip.

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Why did Maxine toss a clock in the air?

She wanted to see time fly.

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When Alan was arrested, why couldn't he accept invitations?

He was fully booked.

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Why did Maxine think her neighbors were squares?

Because they liked square dancing.

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What did Heaven say to the angel that put too much dew on the grass?

Don't over dew it.

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Why didn't the clam share its food?

Because it was shell-fish.

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How did Bill feel when none of the off-switches for the lights worked?

He felt that they were all up-settings.

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Which U.S. city do people have the hardest time losing weight?

Gainesville, FL

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This is our new dog, Crusty.

All he does is loaf around all day.

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