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What was the result of Joe not having enough self-control with eating?

He found that it was a big waist.

18

How do you get someone to say 'Who's there?'

You say 'Knock, knock'

2974

What name for cigarettes describes the harm they do?

Sick-arettes.

289

Which doctor is best to oversee your knee surgery?

The Joint Chief of Staff

186

What do you call a pencil too short to sharpen anymore?

A point of no return.

2125

How to summarize a person's life after being convicted of a crime?

Con descending.

1125

When one spouse says, 'I've had it up to here', what can the other spouse say?

What is 'it' and where is 'here'?

611

Why was the singer on a strict diet?

She had to be concerned with both musical scales and other scales.

952

Why did George sell his barber shop?

He found cleaning it to be a hair-raising experience.

871

Rock and roll.

2422

How do mountain goats seem to defy gravity on steep slopes?

They use cliffhangers.

1113

How did Mark regard his habit of drinking beer every day?

He regarded it as minor ale-ment.

2194