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Why was Bob always looking down at his wife's high heel shoes?

Because he was head over heels over her.

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Why did Arnold lie down next to bread in the bakery?

He wanted to be rolling in dough.

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What is it called when a car has a good mother?

Good car ma.

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What did Alice call the hair she cut off because it was full of knots?

Forget me knots.

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How was a comedian asked to perform at the Orthopedist's Convention?

Please...humerus.

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When Marsha told her husband on the phone that she was late, why did he call the police?

She said she was being held up.

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How is someone who falls similar to someone in debt?

They are both losing their balance.

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How did light bulbs get their name?

They are not heavy.

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What happens if certain fowl don't build insulated nests for winter?

They go cold turkey.

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When someone says something outrageous to you, why is it important to speak up?

Because otherwise it becomes in-rageous

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Why are fast runners good looking?

Because they are dashing.

1614

What is ironic about The Flat Earth Society?

Their members are all around the globe.

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