Pictures:

How did President Johnson always know the right thing to say?

A little Birdie told him.

1136

Which division of a hospital has the best patient supervision?

The "I see you" (ICU)

1007

What is someone called who cleans vacuum cleaners?

A vacuum cleaner.

367

What would one say when learning how a skunk's odor is produced?

That makes scents.

2277

Why were the homeowner's dogs silent when a burglar came and went?

They were hush puppies.

1289

How were crews asked to stop construction of this specific hospital?

Please hold the Mayo.

791

Why are men more curious than women?

Because of their "why" chromosomes.

2536

What is the status of one's yard after cleaning up after the dog?

It's dooty-free.

1009

My friend says people think that he is egotistical.

I told him not to have his "I" out for them.

1492

Why is an Achilles tendon injury so severe?

They take forever to heel.

1176

Which paintings are not on display in museums?

Those with no strings attached.

194

Why was the vegetarian disappointed at the dinner party?

He thought sweetbreads came from a bakery.

754