Pictures:

Why were the homeowner's dogs silent when a burglar came and went?

They were hush puppies.

1289

Why was the vegetarian disappointed at the dinner party?

He thought sweetbreads came from a bakery.

754

What do you call the top 2 Chinese translators?

The Co-Mandarin Chiefs

73

Why does a music conductor turn his back on the audience?

He must face the music.

1278

How do patrons locate a Greek restaurant when their GPS isn't working?

They use a gyro scope

337

Why did Debra Smith come up with exactly 1,263 famous idioms?

That's all she wrote.

1791

Who made outdoor tables and chairs popular in Dublin?

Paddy O'Furniture

2242

Why did the writer visit the U.S. Mint?

To coin a phrase.

199

Why did Paul put on his glasses when working with his team?

To make sure everyone was clear.

1231

Why don't ATM machines provide quarters?

It doesn't make cents.

2240

A 5 o'clock shadow.

1280

How do weight loss clinics refer to conversations regarding restricted foods?

Ate speech

1463