Pictures:

My friend says people think that he is egotistical.

I told him not to have his "I" out for them.

1492

Why are trombone players usually easy going people?

They've learned to let things slide.

827

What device do psychologists use to measure positive emotions?

An Oh!dometer

840

Is this cat anything special?

Yes - it's The Cat in the Hat.

2062

What course does a punster take to go from making bad to good puns?

End o'cringe-ology

2004

Joseph Glidden invented the modern security fence. Who was his wife?

Barb

1153

Why was President Clinton elected in between Presidents George H. and George H.W.?

Because a Bill at hand is worth two in the Bush.

279

How were people getting hit by the same bicycle every day?

It was a vicous cycle.

2222

Why did Sunil move away from Delhi?

He found it full of baloney.

1078

Which U.S. Army battalion drives up to and then crawls under barbed-wire fences?

Jeepers Creepers

213

Where was the toilet invented?

Flushing, NY

508

Why is there a lack of neurologists?

Few have the nerve.

245