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Why did the luxury home builder use only inexpensive laminate kitchen countertops?

He lost his marbles

216

Why is this wild cat upset?

He was told that cheetahs never prosper.

309

Why should one take colitis seriously?

It could lead to a semi-colon.

1071

How are making puns similar to oil drilling?

They both can be crude or refined.

2136

What's a good career for a Math Major?

An Add Executive

2225

What happened when a jar of pickles spilled onto music sheets?

It made sour notes.

690

Why are jellyfish so mean?

Because they're spineless.

1061

How did the man get his young dog to stop barking?

He wore Hush Puppies

220

Why do UN ambassadors stay so healthy?

Diplomatic Immunity

2956

What's a good name for a plumbing supply distributor?

Sink Inc.

982

How to describe a boxer too tired to continue?

Out of whack.

637

Why is lumping people together not a good practice?

Because to average them is "mean".

782