Pictures:

Is basting a real stitch?

Mmm...sew-sew.

2326

How is he trying to lose weight by wearing bread on his head?

It's a new loaf hat diet.

1351

If it's bad to overbake a cake, what if you underbake it?

Then it's batter.

1992

What do you call a bear that is manic depressive?

A bi-polar bear.

1861

How does a pipefitter foreman ensure his workers aren't too noisy when on jobsites?

He asks them to pipe down.

983

What happened when the drummer rejoined the marching band?

There were repercussions.

1257

Why is rationalizing worse than we think?

It uses rational lies.

240

What happens if you ask your builder not to carpet the steps in your house?

He'll give you a blank stair.

1233

Why is it that lions get more food than tigers, leopards, and jaguars?

They always get the lion's share

271

Why did Sally serve beef jerky at the dinner party?

It was her dry sense of humor.

551

What are mens' favorite legume?

Chick peas

683

Why did the judge put the man in jail for stealing from the bakery?

Evidence showed he really took the cake.

198