Pictures:

Do allergists make a good living?

It's nothing to sneeze at.

243

How does a pipefitter foreman ensure his workers aren't too noisy when on jobsites?

He asks them to pipe down.

983

Why did the weight-loss clinic hire a dermotologist?

To make people skinny.

1816

What course does a punster take to go from making bad to good puns?

End o'cringe-ology

2004

Why did the newborn require immediate surgery?

He was born with a silver spoon in his mouth.

1274

Why did the obese woman get insulted when the doctor estimated her weight?

The doctor called it a "ballpark figure".

200

Come Precious...it's time for dinner!

Not right meow.

2061

What do you call someone who believes only 12.5% in a Universal Being?

An eighth-iest

232

What was obvious to everyone, but no one dared mention?

The elephant in the room.

269

What did the uninitiated tourist think when he visited here?

People were talking to the wall.

638

Why do jockeys have a reputation for being lazy?

They horse around all day.

619

After going bankrupt, what did Bob name his new honey business?

Plan Bee

2532