Pictures:

Which horse did the cowboy only ride after dark?

A night mare

189

What did the losing coach say about his opponent after losing by 52 points?

I found them very offensive.

1774

Come Precious...it's time for dinner!

Not right meow.

2061

What do you call someone using a fake stun gun?

A taser teaser

329

What can have both a good and bad result?

Pennies from Heaven

209

Why did the general always have his walking stick with him?

He never made decisions without his staff.

1923

How do you know if a commercial zip line is safe?

It complies with the Zip Code.

812

My friend says people think that he is egotistical.

I told him not to have his "I" out for them.

1492

How did the the drunkard summarize his drinking binge?

With a short schnapsis

181

What is not a nice way to describe how one's vacuum cleaner works?

It sucks!

368

Why did John think he had Type O blood, when he really had Type A?

His birth records had a Type O.

573

What did Mount Rushmore look like before it was carved?

Un-presidented.

9