Pictures:

What are the odds that this man will slim down?

A fat chance.

380

Why did the man give up Reader's Digest?

He had a digestive disorder.

1068

A son of a gun.

330

What's the name of the lady who owns the Japanese restaurant?

Sue, she.

339

Why did the homeowner get upset that he had to install this?

He just needed to vent.

639

What items does someone most need to weather an emergency?

Staples

294

Why did Sally serve beef jerky at the dinner party?

It was her dry sense of humor.

551

Which window specialty focuses on commercial accounts?

Pane Management specialists.

758

Which U.S. city do people have the hardest time losing weight?

Gainesville, FL

422

What is the motto of the National Lactose Intolerance Association?

No Whey!

234

What is another name for a florist?

A petal pusher

509

Why was President Clinton elected in between Presidents George H. and George H.W.?

Because a Bill at hand is worth two in the Bush.

279