If a friend's cousin donates a kidney to a friend's cousin, what does it make the two friends?

Second cousins, once removed.

1810

What is one advantage of being indecisive?

Receiving the benefit of the doubt.

1821

Why did the quarterback run instead of throwing to his wide receiver?

He was cut off at the pass.

492

How do we know that Sinatra only took local streets?

It's either "My way", or the highway.

1297

What do you call online support for barbers?

Eclips

2130

What is the motto of the National Lactose Intolerance Association?

No Whey!

234

What happened to the unsold bread from the commercial bakery?

It was toast.

434

What is an orthodontist's main goal?

A sound bite

210

Why was the optician embarrassed the morning after the party?

He'd made a spectacle of himself.

352

What is the study of scientific breakthroughs?

Newrology

2000

Why was the tourist dropped off on a deserted island?

He requested an isle seat.

1461

Why don't some believe in Evolution?

They think it's monkey business.

1798