Pictures:

What happens if someone accidently drank hair coloring?

They could dye.

1475

What was the first name of the woman who invented soft drinks, and where did she live?

Sarah soda

419

What did the mother do whose son chewed on an electrical cord?

She grounded him until he conducted himself properly.

433

Why was the homeowner scared of the zombies at his front door?

They were dead ringers of friends of his.

1277

Why was the plumber scared to unclog bathroom sinks?

It was always a hair-raising experience.

1024

How did Gary build a successful drainpipe business?

Having his mind in the gutter.

1805

What was the result of the vote?

Neighs won.

1486

What did they say about the king who was only 12 inches tall?

He was an excellent ruler.

3209

What did the man say when he no longer needed to wear glasses?

Bye, focals!

932

Why should you never scream into one of these?

You'll strain your voice.

1239

My friend says people think that he is egotistical.

I told him not to have his "I" out for them.

1492

What is the largest bone on hippos?

Their hips.

1065