Pictures:

Why did the soldier not want to share his rank with other people?

It was private.

1087

A book about basement renovation ideas?

Best Cellars

2215

Why does John like recruiting people to work in skyscrapers?

He loved telling people they were highered.

1484

How was the octopus able beat the shark in a fight?

It was well armed.

795

Where is the Royal Rodeo held?

Buckingham palace.

1436

Why is this wild cat upset?

He was told that cheetahs never prosper.

309

Why did Jerry choose to work with the elderly?

He enjoyed other Jerry-atrics.

246

What is the most important thing to have when sanding wood?

True grit.

1453

What's wrong with overseeing a coatroom in July?

Nobody has hang-ups.

1075

Horses are fun to ride...

...but make terrible neigh bors.

1485

What happens if you ask your builder not to carpet the steps in your house?

He'll give you a blank stair.

1233

Why did the obese woman get insulted when the doctor estimated her weight?

The doctor called it a "ballpark figure".

200