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What happened when a jar of pickles spilled onto music sheets?

It made sour notes.

690

Why did George sell his barber shop?

He found cleaning it to be a hair-raising experience.

871

What did Jay say when there was an explosion at his factory?

"Let the chips fall where they may".

874

How was a comedian asked to perform at the Orthopedist's Convention?

Please...humerus.

1077

How did the squirrel corner the market on acorns?

He opened many branches.

182

What do we know about this man?

He's getting too big for his britches.

1307

Which U.S. city do people have the hardest time losing weight?

Gainesville, FL

422

Why did Mike lose his job as a masseur?

He rubbed people the wrong way.

574

Who does one who can't figure out their career speak to?

An Occupational Therapist.

2006

How did Gary build a successful drainpipe business?

Having his mind in the gutter.

1805

Why did the mother have sore hands?

She had meta-carpools.

1064

A son of a gun.

330