Pictures:

How in one word can one complain that their grapes aren't ripe yet?

Gripe

872

Why did one man leave the card playing group of his wife's friends?

He needed to "de-talks".

506

How are the prices at the new Italian restaurant?

They cost a pretty penne.

781

What sickness does one get from building too hot a fire in a ski cottage?

Cabin fever

704

Why was was it so loud everywhere Tim went?

He liked stealing everyone's thunder.

1320

How much does it cost to swim with sharks?

An arm and a leg.

2217

Why do people dislike washing windows?

They're a pane.

371

How was the octopus able beat the shark in a fight?

It was well armed.

795

What happens when parents from Asia spin their children?

They become dis-Oriented

2316

Why was this man being treated intervenously?

He had severe poison i.v.

884

What do you call the owner of a curtain ring company?

The ringleader

378

A 5 o'clock shadow.

1280