Pictures:

Why does John like recruiting people to work in skyscrapers?

He loved telling people they were highered.

1484

Why is being a cloud seeder such an easy job?

They just shoot the breeze all day long.

1785

What was the policeman's response when Bill said he was speeding to get to his yoga class?

He thought it was a stretch.

183

What is this fooseball player in need of?

Plastic Surgery

2001

Which sea creature is stranger than a platypus?

An odder

188

Why is there a lack of neurologists?

Few have the nerve.

245

What items does someone most need to weather an emergency?

Staples

294

Why do deer hunters prefer larger guns?

It's a bigger bang for their buck.

1273

Which college shows the most compassion to fire victims?

Aw, burn University

484

How is he trying to lose weight by wearing bread on his head?

It's a new loaf hat diet.

1351

Which crime is most prevalent at this school?

Assault

488

How do mountain goats seem to defy gravity on steep slopes?

They use cliffhangers.

1113