Pictures:

Why did Debra Smith come up with exactly 1,263 famous idioms?

That's all she wrote.

1791

What happens to old auto mechanics?

They just re-tire.

197

Which career works the fewest hours per week?

A Monday morning quarterback.

1265

Is the entire world starting to think exactly the same?

Just the indoctri-nations.

1114

How do some people deal with eating leftovers on Black Friday?

They go cold turkey.

212

What is true about this famous journalist?

His name is Mudd

1298

What diagnosis caused the man to break his leg by being too anxious?

A stress fracture

296

What is the term for a relapse of influenza?

Deja Flu

2955

How did Jeff's friends realize he finished his entire "bucket list" over the weekend?

He looked pail

1464

How long must one walk a dog that lives indoors?

Until they're pooped.

2548

What did county workers accomplish with this sign?

A bee-line.

1296

Why is an Achilles tendon injury so severe?

They take forever to heel.

1176