Pictures:

How did the the drunkard summarize his drinking binge?

With a short schnapsis

181

How were crews asked to stop construction of this specific hospital?

Please hold the Mayo.

791

What do you call a sick lawyer?

ill legal.

1432

What did the cemetery director say when a man bought one grave, and then another for his wife?

"Hmm...the plot thickens!"

255

How did Gary build a successful drainpipe business?

Having his mind in the gutter.

1805

Why did the newborn require immediate surgery?

He was born with a silver spoon in his mouth.

1274

What's the best way to get people to listen to you?

Create a heeded discussion.

1496

Why did Stu work for the Dept. of Transportation?

He loves hitting the road.

1826

What is the proper term for a clash between snakes?

A hissy fit

219

How to summarize a person's life after being convicted of a crime?

Con descending.

1125

What is it called when police interrogate a hen?

Grilled chicken.

1722

What is the proper way to greet the Dalai Lama?

Hello Dalai!

282