Pictures:

What is as important as a good watch dog?

A good CAT scan

284

Have you heard of the band called Cellophane?

They're a wrap group.

797

Why did Bill order these to wear himself?

He's trying to lose weight through resistance-training.

1514

Is basting a real stitch?

Mmm...sew-sew.

2326

Who was the head baker to the junior baker?

Her roll model.

1316

Which device measures carbohydrates?

A carburetor

841

Why is being a jockey such a desirable profession?

They just horse around all day.

619

What happens to one's ability to walk after 8 drinks?

The results are staggering.

1235

Why is being grateful the best investment?

It always appreciates.

2159

What happened when shipping containers with materials for making shoes sank?

There were thousands of lost soles.

1408

What did the man say whose property was destroyed by a meteor?

It really left an impact.

592

What did the mason say when he realized an error was made on a headstone?

What a grave mistake.

256