Pictures:

What do you call a PhD in Mathematics?

An Add Executive.

1458

Why do commuters need sleep specialists?

They are always exhausted.

2219

How much does a teenager weigh?

An Instagram.

796

What did the uninitiated tourist think when he visited here?

People were talking to the wall.

638

What type of gopher is the most difficult to keep out of a celery patch?

A stalker

1444

Why did the weight-loss clinic hire a dermotologist?

To make people skinny.

1816

Why did the weasel go to prison?

The mink stole.

1042

Did you hear about the lawsuit between NBA players and the league?

It was a basket case.

1271

Who was more intelligent as a child - Alec Baldwin or Alec Guinness?

They were both Smart Alecs.

1126

What's the motto of the National Air Traffic Controller Association?

"Don't know if you're coming or going? We do!".

236

How does one shorten a coughing fit?

Using a hack

1396

What did they say about the king who was only 12 inches tall?

He was an excellent ruler.

3209