Pictures:

Shane Ronay
General
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What is a good 2-part security method?

Beagles and locks.

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Shane Ronay
General
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Where in Manhattan are you most likely to find a spot for your car?

Central Park

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Shane Ronay
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How is he trying to lose weight by wearing bread on his head?

It's a new loaf hat diet.

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Shane Ronay
General
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Why did Joe work in a pizza shop?

He kneaded the dough.

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Shane Ronay
General
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If a friend's cousin donates a kidney to his friend's cousin, what does it make the two friends?

Second cousins, once removed.

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Shane Ronay
General
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How did diners at the Chinese restaurant react to the LED lighting?

They asked if they could Dim Sum.

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Shane Ronay
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Which company broadcasts highlights of basketball, hockey, tennis, and soccer?

Net-flix

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Shane Ronay
General
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How did the "Closed" sign read at the smoke shop?

Close...but no cigar!

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Shane Ronay
General
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Where do livestock veterinarians have their prescriptions filled?

At the local farmacy

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Shane Ronay
General
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Which country makes the best pan-seared steaks?

Syria

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Shane Ronay
General
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Why did Bob think this would be a balanced diet?

It was 3 square meals a day.

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Shane Ronay
General
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What do you get when your optician is a comedian?

A man who makes a spectacle of himself.

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