Pictures:

Why did Janet join the church choir?

She likes singing hims.

1481

Who was the person mistaken for someone's father?

A faux pa

2261

What does Sue do all day?

Sue

1482

Which nut makes people sneeze?

The ca...ca...SHEW!

790

What device do psychologists use to measure positive emotions?

An Oh!dometer

840

What was the frustrated mother grateful for after trying to toilet train her toddler?

ICBM

332

What does a smart person have in common with a school principal?

They are both in charge of their faculties.

3168

What do you call someone who believes only 12.5% in a Universal Being?

An eighth-iest

232

How does one get men to listen?

Stress to "He'd" his words.

1483

Which hospital uses high-fat condiments to cure diseases?

The Mayo Clinic

1001

What's wrong with overseeing a coatroom in July?

Nobody has hang-ups.

1075

What happens to an ethical Italian cleaning lady after she passes away?

She's a maid in heaven.

1495