Pictures:

What's this man's problem?

He has an axe to grind.

1270

Why was the vegetarian disappointed at the dinner party?

He thought sweetbreads came from a bakery.

754

What is always the main topic at the annual Surfing Conference?

Current events.

1788

Which nut makes people sneeze?

The ca...ca...SHEW!

790

Which dog breed enjoys eating twice as much as other breeds?

The Chow Chow

1519

How would you refer to your dog-sitting neighbor that lost your pet?

Your dog gone neighbor.

1557

How much does a teenager weigh?

An Instagram.

796

Why is this bench so comfortable?

The lumber support.

1062

What does Sue do all day?

Sue

1482

What did the procrastinator tell those who said he'd never get anywhere?

"You just wait!"

2220

What do you call someone who has lost their sense of taste?

Tasteless

2562

Why was Achmed the thief unpopular with the other shepherds?

He got other people's goats.

1797