Pictures:

Why did the newborn require immediate surgery?

He was born with a silver spoon in his mouth.

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Why was Fred training male deer to run fast?

To make a fast buck.

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Why do some people seem to find things out before others?

They're member of the heard.

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Why do electricians monitor the news so closely?

To keep current.

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Who owns the largest number of private business aircraft?

King Lear

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What is the vegetable of choice for most percussionists?

Beets, of course.

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How do you distinguish between a numerator and denominator?

There's a fine line between the two.

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Why was the girl so upset to have to repeat her class?

She felt degraded.

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What is Santa Claus's favorite agricultural activity?

Hoe, hoe, hoe.

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Why did the flock of unshorn sheep keep bumping into each other?

They had the wool over their eyes

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Why did the man buy so much bottled water?

There was a liquidation sale.

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Who invented tiny nails?

A guy named Brad.

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