Pictures:

Why was the optician embarrassed the morning after the party?

He'd made a spectacle of himself.

352

Which U.S. Army battalion drives up to and then crawls under barbed-wire fences?

Jeepers Creepers

213

What's the best way to get people to listen to you?

Create a heeded discussion.

1496

Why must all people grow spiritually?

It's our soul purpose.

1993

How did we know the Russian musician would be a good match for the ballet dancer?

Because he played the ballet lika.

815

Is the entire world starting to think exactly the same?

Just the indoctri-nations.

1114

What was the source of Bob's mortal foot injury?

He kicked the bucket.

1812

What do you call a PhD in Mathematics?

An Add Executive.

1458

What is the man on the right doing?

Scraping the bottom of the barrel from the top.

1302

What happens if certain fowl don't build insulated nests for winter?

They go cold turkey.

1276

Why are there so many types of Asian cuisine?

For different woks of life.

1287

What's worse than a strong reprimand?

An icy stair.

351