Pictures:

Why was the optician embarrassed the morning after the party?

He'd made a spectacle of himself.

352

Why was WC Fields not very popular in England?

Because of his first initials.

636

Why do some of these specific instruments look different from the others?

They're members of the opposite sax.

826

Why did the graffiti artist stop before he was arrested for vandalism?

He read the writing on the wall.

873

Which country is most upset about gas-guzzling automobiles?

Mad at gas car

1103

Why is there a lack of neurologists?

Few have the nerve.

245

What does Sue do all day?

Sue

1482

Which college shows the most compassion to fire victims?

Aw, burn University

484

Who represents the National Bicycle Tire Association?

Their spokesman

3208

Why did this guy think he'd be good at bartending?

He came from a "pour" family.

2523

When would someone use fine sandpaper?

When they are off coarse.

1452

How did this team win the championship?

They put up their Dukes.

1267