Pictures:

Why did astrophysicist Steven Hawking fail his history class?

It wasn't rocket science.

1262

What can have both a good and bad result?

Pennies from Heaven

209

Why did Tom get fired from the kitchen hardware business?

He just couldn't handle it.

379

Which Russian leader used delay tactics as a military strategy?

Stallin'

852

Why are bakery employees so nice to their customers?

They know where their bread is buttered.

435

What do you call an Arabic Elvis impersonator?

Amal Shookup

2284

What's the best way to eliminate vapor from your windshield?

I haven't the foggiest idea.

1775

Who does one who can't figure out their career speak to?

An Occupational Therapist.

2006

What happened to the circus performer who swallowed a wood file?

He got a raspy voice.

1006

Is this cat anything special?

Yes - it's The Cat in the Hat.

2062

How does one refer to the hallways at mental institutions?

Psycho paths.

3049

Who oversees chickens?

Chicken Tenders

2663