Pictures:

Why was was it so loud everywhere Tim went?

He liked stealing everyone's thunder.

1320

What do you call an airline founded by a group of inheritors?

United Heirlines

1459

Why did the army's mortar shells keep falling out?

They were dealing with a loose canon.

215

How did this person respond when asked how they're doing?

Doing well, thank you.

1449

Why don't gluten-free people consume wheat?

It goes against their grain.

436

How does one shorten a coughing fit?

Using a hack

1396

How did the Head of Engineering at MIT get his job?

By being a roads scholar

3221

Why did Jay attend traffic court for his illegal Left Turn?

He knew he was right.

1090

Who was always $1 in debt?

Buck Owens

2214

A son of a gun.

330

What is this man doing in the doctor's office?

Drawing blood.

1043

How are the prices at the new Italian restaurant?

They cost a pretty penne.

781