Pictures:

Why should one take colitis seriously?

It could lead to a semi-colon.

1071

Why was the optician embarrassed the morning after the party?

He'd made a spectacle of himself.

352

How does one obtain a very firm crease from the dry cleaner?

Request an increase.

580

What's another way of referring to "the middle of the ocean"?

The Marine Core

1471

What did the losing coach say about his opponent after losing by 52 points?

I found them very offensive.

1774

What do you call a sick lawyer?

ill legal.

1432

What did the cemetery director say when a man bought one grave, and then another for his wife?

"Hmm...the plot thickens!"

255

Why did the newborn require immediate surgery?

He was born with a silver spoon in his mouth.

1274

Joseph Glidden invented the modern security fence. Who was his wife?

Barb

1153

Who was the head baker to the junior baker?

Her roll model.

1316

What's a good name for a plumbing company?

In Sink

981

Who was Alexander Graham Belsky?

The first telephone Pole

281