Pictures:

How does one obtain a very firm crease from the dry cleaner?

Request an increase.

580

Why did the writer visit the U.S. Mint?

To coin a phrase.

199

Why did the woman crash into the building where Mark had just been standing?

Her driving instructor told to hit the mark.

1801

Why should we have more appreciation for street contractors?

Because they pave the way for us.

635

Why was Achmed the thief unpopular with the other shepherds?

He got other people's goats.

1797

Joseph Glidden invented the modern security fence. Who was his wife?

Barb

1153

What happened when shipping containers with materials for making shoes sank?

There were thousands of lost soles.

1408

What is as important as a good watch dog?

A good CAT scan

284

Why was the small horse limited to merely walking in a straight line?

It was a one-trick-pony.

270

How do mountain goats seem to defy gravity on steep slopes?

They use cliffhangers.

1113

What is someone called who cleans vacuum cleaners?

A vacuum cleaner.

367

What would Freud say if he made a commercial?

"Let go of my ego".

1493