Pictures:

Who was more intelligent as a child - Alec Baldwin or Alec Guinness?

They were both Smart Alecs.

1126

Why did the man buy so much bottled water?

There was a liquidation sale.

1026

Why was no one able to buy more summer hats after a man just did?

That was the last straw.

191

Who is in charge of a bicycle factory?

The spokesperson

2216

What happened on April 16th and 17th 1986?

This man got his dates mixed up.

1085

Which crime is most prevalent at this school?

Assault

488

What happens if you ask your builder not to carpet the steps in your house?

He'll give you a blank stair.

1233

How did this team win the championship?

They put up their Dukes.

1267

What do you call a one-legged hippo?

A hoppo

2602

How to describe a boxer too tired to continue?

Out of whack.

637

Why should one take colitis seriously?

It could lead to a semi-colon.

1071

What do you call an Arabic Elvis impersonator?

Amal Shookup

2284