Pictures:

Why did the luxury home builder use only inexpensive laminate kitchen countertops?

He lost his marbles

216

How did the trucking company become so successful?

They went the extra mile.

323

How did Gary build a successful drainpipe business?

Having his mind in the gutter.

1805

Which fruits pair well with Chinese food?

Mandarin oranges or pears.

1052

What is another name for a car's complete history?

An autobiography.

173

How to summarize a person's life after being convicted of a crime?

Con descending.

1125

Why do UN ambassadors stay so healthy?

Diplomatic Immunity

2956

When would someone use fine sandpaper?

When they are off coarse.

1452

Why did the pastry chef cut her chocolate cake at such sharp angles?

She wanted Brownie points

211

Why is there a lack of neurologists?

Few have the nerve.

245

How to describe a boxer too tired to continue?

Out of whack.

637

Why do the Polish not force their cuisine on others?

They figure it's their pierogi-tive.

333