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Akiva Lane
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What did the new doctor say to the retiring doctor whose practice he bought?

Thanks for your patients.

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Akiva Lane
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Why is this very useful?

Because people say they'll do things when they get a round tuit.

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Akiva Lane
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Why didn't Barry ever work out in the gym?

He planned to go there, but it never worked out.

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of scientist studies bubbles?

A fizz-a-cist.

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Akiva Lane
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Was there any limit to how good the costumes would be at the costume ball?

Disguise the limit.

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Akiva Lane
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What was the motto of the company that made horror movies?

We've only begun to fright.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the athlete go into the recording studio?

He wanted to make records.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the elder people like the larger playing cards?

For them it was a big deal.

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Akiva Lane
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What 5 one syllable words rhyme and are all dramatic?

Purge, surge, urge, merge, and splurge.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was the elephant that lived in Manhattan depressed?

It couldn't find work, so it felt ir-elephant.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Jerry Teck become a computer programmer?

Because people always said to him 'Hi Teck'.

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Akiva Lane
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In the race, how did the runner's shoes do?

They were all tied.

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