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Akiva Lane
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What did the husband say when he brought his wife flowers?

This bud's for you.

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Akiva Lane
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When the phone caller said 'I hope I'm not disturbing you', how did Andy respond?

Andy said, "You can't disturb me, because I'm already disturbed".

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of tree teaches us about shapes?

Geoma tree.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Arlene bring a piece of wood and a dog to her first weaving class?

She heard they were going to learn about the warp and the woof.

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Akiva Lane
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What did the king's wife say to the king?

Reign, dear.

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Akiva Lane
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Why didn't Bill have a good vacation?

By mistake he went to a hostile instead of a hostel.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Goldie Jones call her lock company?

Goldie Locks.

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How did Bill lose so much weight?

Whenever he was about to eat - he thought of the word 'weight', and it reminded him to wait.

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of bush can take you by surprise?

An ambush.

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Akiva Lane
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If a hiker meets in the woods a large bear on the left and a small bear on the right, what should he do?

Bear right.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Beth get so upset when there was only one straw left in the dining room, and someone else took it?

Because that was the last straw!

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Akiva Lane
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What is a meal eaten by a pilot in a supersonic jet?

Fast food.

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