Pictures:

Akiva Lane
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Why can you trust an expert in sound systems?

He gives sound advice.

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Akiva Lane
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What does a policeman, a fireman, and a doorman all have in common?

They're all men.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Joan do after she attached her schedule to a helium balloon?

She didn't know, because her plans were up in the air.

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What is used to lubricate the joints of a robot?

Elbow grease.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the husband and wife put their hands in the sink together when they wanted to communicate?

It helped them be in-sink with each other.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the word 'hour' get its name?

Because it is 'ours' to do with as we choose.

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What music do you wrap presents to?

Rap music.

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Why is a child's cry called a wail?

Because sometimes it seems as big as a whale.

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Akiva Lane
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What happens when a threat starts moving?

It's no longer an idle threat.

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What's does track & field have in common with a Polish bank?

They both have Pole vaults.

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How did Lisa feel when she found that someone had pressed all the buttons in the elevator?

She found it depressing.

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What is similar between a house of worship and Swiss cheese?

They're both holy.

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