Pictures:

Why did Emma avoid using coins?

She thought they were all two-faced.

364

How do we always know who a child's mother is?

When she is pregnant and gives birth, it's apparent.

2614

What is the person who a cougher coughs on called?

Coffee.

944

Why wasn't Charlotte concerned when she misplaced the basket of turnups?

She figured they would turnup somewhere.

1807

What did Sylvia say when her lunch fell down a well by mistake?

Oh, well.

369

How did Bill react when he saw graffiti in his school?

He knew that the handwriting was on the wall.

468

What is it called when someone had a good date, and tells you about it?

An update.

2186

What is someone who can keep a secret called?

A secretary.

735

What did Michael Sherlock call the housing development that he built?

Sherlock Homes.

2607

What is a bee called right after it is born?

A newbie.

2604

When Jeff asked his friend, "What is worse, ignorance or apathy?" how did his friend answer?

His friend answered, "I don't know, and I don't care".

899

What did the mother say to get her son to stop playing video games and come to dinner?

Step up to the plate.

3025