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Akiva Lane
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Why did Emma avoid using coins?

She thought they were all two-faced.

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Akiva Lane
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How do we always know who a child's mother is?

When she is pregnant and gives birth, it's apparent.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the person who a cougher coughs on called?

Coffee.

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Akiva Lane
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Why wasn't Charlotte concerned when she misplaced the basket of turnups?

She figured they would turnup somewhere.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Sylvia say when her lunch fell down a well by mistake?

Oh, well.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Bill react when he saw graffiti in his school?

He knew that the handwriting was on the wall.

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Akiva Lane
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What is it called when someone had a good date, and tells you about it?

An update.

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Akiva Lane
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What is someone who can keep a secret called?

A secretary.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Michael Sherlock call the housing development that he built?

Sherlock Homes.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a bee called right after it is born?

A newbie.

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Akiva Lane
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When Jeff asked his friend, "What is worse, ignorance or apathy?" how did his friend answer?

His friend answered, "I don't know, and I don't care".

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Akiva Lane
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What did the mother say to get her son to stop playing video games and come to dinner?

Step up to the plate.

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