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Akiva Lane
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Why was the ballet teacher considered to be so good?

She really kept her students on their toes.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Ed surprised he had a moustache?

He didn't shave there for a while, and it happened under his nose.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you say to a friend who is trying to uproot a tree

I'm rooting for you.

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Why did Alan make sure his deck wasn't empty when he played with his kids?

He wanted to make sure he was playing with a full deck.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a hippie who is a phony?

A hippie-crit.

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Akiva Lane
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What do teachers and eyes have in common?

They both have pupils.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call something that is very, very natural?

Super natural.

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When Stephanie inventeted a way of saying that someone is at the door without ringing a bell, what prize did she win?

The No-Bell prize.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Edith insist on drinking tea out of her own cup?

Any other way was not her cup of tea.

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What are groups called that claim they know all the facts?

Factions.

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Akiva Lane
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What is this?

C to shining C

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Akiva Lane
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How do we know that the water in back of a boat is not asleep?

Because it's a wake.

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