Pictures:

Akiva Lane
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How did the young lady feel when her date was rude?

She felt dis-missed.

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of running results in having less of something?

Running out of something.

2047
Akiva Lane
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What do you call college students who go back to school in the fall?

Autumn leaves.

1990
Akiva Lane
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What did the mid-wife say to the woman giving birth?

Grin and bear it.

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Akiva Lane
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Why is it often difficult to communicate messages to other people?

Because often they begin with a mess.

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Akiva Lane
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If something is furbished twice, what does it become?

Refurbished.

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Akiva Lane
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After working for 40 years, why didn't Joe want new tires on his car?

He wasn't ready to re-tire.

2164
Akiva Lane
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What happens when a threat starts moving?

It's no longer an idle threat.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Bobby feel when he spilled a jar of olive oil on himself in the morning?

It was too oily in the morning.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the Smith family feel when they spent a lot of money painting their house blue, and they didn't like the color?

They felt they blew it, and they had the blues.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the couple decide to get married?

They found each other very engaging.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was the keyboard unhappy?

Because its keys were always depressed.

2099