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Akiva Lane
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What is a gym called filled with people who want to lose weight?

A waist land.

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What seal agrees with everything?

The seal of approval.

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What is the Sherlock Holmes story where he solves the mystery of the missing pillow?

The pillow case.

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Why was the football team surprised when their opponents punted the football?

They thought there was no punt intended.

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What did Jimmy call the money he made from selling thumb tacks?

Income tacks.

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When we treat others with tact, what is the result?

Our relationships remain intact.

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What's the motto of a computer programmer who enjoys programming?

I never metadata I didn't like.

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Why did the Teddy Bear go outside?

It felt stuffy inside the house.

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What is the beginning and end of a hail storm called?

Inhale and exhale.

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What part of doors can you eat?

The lox.

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When Jeff asked his friend, "What is worse, ignorance or apathy?" how did his friend answer?

His friend answered, "I don't know, and I don't care".

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What is it called when a leak is fixed in the ceiling?

Sealing the ceiling.

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