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Why did the athlete go into the recording studio?

He wanted to make records.

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What is the heaviest soup?

One Ton soup.

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Why is it so easy to feel relaxed while using the internet?

Because so many websites have 'dot calm' in their name.

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What do these have in common? A smelly basketball, hitting a baseball too far to the right or left, and a dance of chickens?

They are all a foul ball.

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Why did Jim eat steak when he was investing in companies?

Because he wanted a stake in the companies.

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How do baseball players keep in touch with each other?

They touch base with each other.

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What do you call software whose sales are flat?

Flatware

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What do you call an appointment that gets cancelled?

A dis-appointment.

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How did Sarah feel about not getting concert tickets to see her favorite band?

She found it dis-concerting.

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How can we summarize that Bill ruined his life because of a gambling addiction?

He threw away paradise for a pair of dice.

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If a window was put into the neck of the Statue of Liberty, what would it be called?

A pane in the neck.

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What is similar between paying for a meal and ducks?

They both have bills.

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