Pictures:

What does Arthur wear when he drinks tea?

A t-shirt.

1938

Why is sitting sometimes difficult?

You have to sit down and sit up at the same time.

1119

How did Oedipus feel when he found out about his parents?

Oedipus wreck.

313

Why is the last part of a meal called dessert?

That's when people desert their diet.

34

Why did Betty put things on the kitchen scale at 1pm for 9 hours?

She wanted to measure them on a scale from 1 to 10.

528

What is an example of a ring that weighs nothing?

The ring of a phone or of a doorbell.

2653

Did Betty know where her lost ring was?

Off hand, she didn't know.

1981

What was it called when Grace tossed a pea pod to someone she wanted to stop arguing with?

A pod cast to start a peas process.

1181

What did the new doctor say to the retiring doctor whose practice he bought?

Thanks for your patients.

1387

What happened when the horses ran away from the farm?

It destabilized the farm.

2414

What is a pretty angle called?

Acute angle.

1254

What do you call a perfect egg?

Egg-selent.

463