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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a crockpot that is broken?

A crackpot.

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of ship demands total control?

Dictator ship

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Akiva Lane
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What do you get when you are in a hurry?

You get going.

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Akiva Lane
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What happened when Ben was stuck in traffic and missed his doctor's appointment?

It became a dis-appointment.

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Akiva Lane
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When Sara asked her friends to contribute to make the chocolate chip cookies, did they?

Yes, they chipped in.

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Akiva Lane
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When Jeff asked his friend, "What is worse, ignorance or apathy?" how did his friend answer?

His friend answered, "I don't know, and I don't care".

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Akiva Lane
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Though Joe was a great pitcher, why did he insist on playing other positions on the baseball team?

He didn't want to be pitch-in holed.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call it when the mother and midwife work hard together to give birth to a baby?

A labor union.

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Akiva Lane
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Did Arlene like the new vacuum cleaner?

She thought it sucks.

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Why did Bill and Eddie start their company at the radar dish?

Because they wanted the business to be under the radar.

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What day do armies go off to battle?

March forth.

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How can you help people who are suspicious?

Change the first letter of suspicious from S to A, to make it auspicious.

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