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Akiva Lane
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What kind of car can become a religious convert?

A convertible.

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How did Arnie feel when he slipped in the garbage dump?

He felt down in the dumps.

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Why did the manager buy wrapping paper?

At the end of meetings he wanted to wrap up the meetings.

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Akiva Lane
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What does a liquor store have in common with a crowded highway?

They both have bottlenecks.

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Why did the tight-rope walker wear warm shoes?

He was concerned about getting cold feet.

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What is cleaning and oiling a pogo stick called?

Spring cleaning.

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Akiva Lane
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What should you take when you feel stressed?

Take a break, and take it easy.

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Akiva Lane
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Why didn't Bill promise his wife that he would be a billionaire?

Because that didn't look very promising.

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What do you call someone in a doctor's office that is in a hurry to see the doctor.

Im-patient.

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What did Bill say when he brought his bike to the bike store to have the brakes fixed?

Give me a break!

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What is the disadvantage of a book having a cover?

You might be tempted to judge the book by it.

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What is an arrangement with UPS, Fedex, or DHL to send a package called?

A package deal.

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