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Akiva Lane
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Why did the mathematician plant an apple tree?

He knew how to multiply, so in addition he wanted to be fruitful.

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Akiva Lane
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Why didn't Bill like going to the aquarium?

He thought there was something fishy about the place.

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Akiva Lane
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What is a survey done over the phone called?

A telephone poll.

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Akiva Lane
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What happens every year in the universe?

We celebrate its universe-ary.

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Akiva Lane
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What did people call their activity of dashing things over the cliffs onto the rocks 100 yards below?

The hundred yard dash.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the Ukraine respond when Russia invaded in 2022?

"You can't rush in!"

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Akiva Lane
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What happened to Bill?

He tripped while he was on a trip.

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Akiva Lane
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Why was Jeremy concerned when he couldn't take off his pickle costume?

Because if he couldn't get it off, he was really in a pickle.

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Akiva Lane
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What can be the problem with a dynasty?

The word ends with nasty.

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Akiva Lane
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What was the main fruit in Noah's ark?

Pears.

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Akiva Lane
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When there is a team of horses, what advantage do the horses in back have?

They have hindsight.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the baseball player have a family meal?

He sat at his home plate.

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