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Akiva Lane
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What room grows on a dead tree?

A mushroom.

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How did Max feel about his rash?

He found it very irritating.

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How did Bill feel when he searched for gold, and found a profitable iron mine?

He thought it was ironic.

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Why was the chef in the Italian restaurant so smart?

He really knew how to use his noodles.

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How did Alice feel when the point of her pencil often broke?

She thought, 'What's the point of using pencils? I'll use pens instead.'

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Why did a lot of people want to use Alan Richter's bathroom scale?

Because they wanted to know what they weighed on the Richter scale.

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What do you call a company that efficiently arranges organ transplants?

An organized organ organization.

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What did the mountain climber call his memoire?

Cliff's Notes.

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When you are very tired and need to rest, where should you go?

A rest room.

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What does an orchestra and a destructive mob have in common?

They both have violins.

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What kind of food does a tight-rope worker try to eat?

A well-balanced diet.

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What is history from a woman's point of view called?

Her Story.

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