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How did Mark regard his habit of drinking beer every day?

He regarded it as minor ale-ment.

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What is an army of babies called?

Infantry.

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Why did the programmer call an exterminator?

Because he had a bug in his program.

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Why is the centipede considered one of the strongest of insects?

It takes a while until it is on its last legs.

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Why does the world have problems?

Because it is bi-polar.

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What happened when the electrician found his mind wandering?

He had a very shocking experience.

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What do dates and apples have it common?

One comes from a palm tree, the other comes from a pomme tree.

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What is a braking system on a vehicle transporting coffee called?

Coffee brakes.

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What do you call a mine that might be silver and might be gold?

Either ore.

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What did the Arial, Helvetica, and Courier fonts say to each other?

You're not my type.

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Bill saved his pennies all year to buy a present for his wife, and brought them to a store, and do you know what he got?

A hernia.

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With the rule "I before E except after C', why is the word 'seize' an exception?

Because it is totally made up 'Seize'

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