Pictures:

What is someone called who lies about how much he eats?

Dish-onest.

1164

What kind of injury does one have be careful about on Halloween?

Getting a boo boo.

1123

How did the veterinarian know that the horse had a cold?

He heard it straight from the horses mouth.

1698

What kind of room is a fungus?

A mushroom.

3162

What vegetable makes the most polite request?

Let us.

1761

What symbol is written before it is pronounced?

The dollar sign.

515

What do you call a cat that steals things?

A feline felon.

1369

What's a good name for a parking garage that treats its customers like royalty?

Par King.

3077

What do teachers and eyes have in common?

They both have pupils.

2308

What permission did the poet need to write poetry?

Poetic license.

1776

How is party different than a toy?

When a party winds up it ends, and when a toy winds up it starts.

1871

Why did Alan make sure his deck wasn't empty when he played with his kids?

He wanted to make sure he was playing with a full deck.

1738