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Akiva Lane
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Why is the Pillsbury doughboy a hippie?

He's a flour child.

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Akiva Lane
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What word and number indicate the winner of a race?

Won and 1.

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Akiva Lane
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What did Alan do when he left his 5th floor apartment in the old apartment building without an elevator?

He walked down and later walked up the run-down staircase in the run-down walk-up.

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Akiva Lane
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What fish do you find at the bottom of the sea?

Low lifes.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the unemployed actor break his leg?

He wanted to be in a cast.

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Akiva Lane
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What did the cheese say when it was shredded?

I feel grate.

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Akiva Lane
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What are people called who have a tendency to act on a whim?

Whim-men.

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Akiva Lane
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Where do people who want to be smuggled across a border go to?

A flee market.

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Akiva Lane
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When Mark got sick and couldn't play trumpet in the school band for a week, what did he do?

The doctor gave him a note that he couldn't play notes.

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Akiva Lane
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Where are the remnants of Noah's Ark kept?

In the Arkive.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Trump remove the restrictions on plastic straws?

Because in terms of government intervention, it was the last straw.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the best month to buy and sell jewelry?

Jewel-eye.

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