Pictures:

Why did Martha not appreciate her beautiful kitchen counters?

She took it for granite.

226

Why was the newborn baby bored?

Because his mother just bore him.

1781

What letter of the alphabet asks the best questions?

Y

2771

What is the motto of chiropractors?

We're got your back.

905

How do you describe someone who pretends to eat something?

He's ingesting in jest.

3177

What is the motto of people who keep to a strict budget?

We have a budget, and we won't let it budge.

2848

What is the problem with @, #, %, &, and *?

They think that they are special characters.

31

Can a person who complains all the time be a vegetarian?

No, because he always has a beef.

1058

What did it prove when the teacher forced the class to write a long essay?

That might makes write.

2981

What is the richest perfume.

Musk.

2496

What did the sweet potato with amnesia say?

I don't know who I yam.

327

What is someone called who lies about how much he eats?

Dish-onest.

1164