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Akiva Lane
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Why did Alan make sure his deck wasn't empty when he played with his kids?

He wanted to make sure he was playing with a full deck.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the difference between giving something away for free and charging a fee for it?

The letter R.

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Akiva Lane
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How did Maxine feel when her stomach started crying because of the way she was eating?

She knew she had an upset stomach.

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Akiva Lane
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What happened when a tree doctor put the bark of an oak tree on a maple tree?

It didn't work, because he was barking up the wrong tree.

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Akiva Lane
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What was it called when Pierre welcomed and praised his guests over a glass of wine?

French toast.

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Akiva Lane
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What does China and Turkey have in common?

They raise red flags.

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Akiva Lane
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What letters are asleep?

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ's

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Matt guard his fence?

He didn't want anyone to take offence.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the singer stand on a key?

He didn't want to sing off key.

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Akiva Lane
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Why didn't Bill like raquetball?

He thought it was off-the-wall.

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Akiva Lane
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What did the clock repairman say when you asked when the talking clock will be fixed?

Time will tell.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did men find it difficult to understand what Abigail Terious was all out?

She was Miss-terious.

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