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Akiva Lane
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What is a good name for a company that certifies bones for dogs to chew on?

Bone-a-fide

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How can psychiatrists charge so much?

Because people have to be crazy to pay those rates.

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What does a penthouse have in common with the lead article in a magazine?

They are both a cover story.

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When the customer asked for coffee without milk, what was the response of the waitress?

I'm sorry, we're out of milk, you'll have to have it without cream.

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What is an experimental program to teach people to fly, called?

A pilot pilot program.

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When Beverly got to the supermarket, why did she first go to the fruits and vegetable section?

Since she was on a diet, it was a step in the right direction.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you have when you remove the red lines?

love

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Akiva Lane
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What can you take when you want some exercize?

You can take a walk.

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Why were Bill's friends always calling him up?

Because his nickname was 'Up'.

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What did Barbie's boyfriend tell her?

You're a doll.

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What is the motto of someone who eats just a little too much?

Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we diet.

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Why was the cook proud of the eggs she made?

Because they were well done.

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