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Akiva Lane
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Why did the police enter the comedy club?

The comedian was a riot.

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Akiva Lane
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Why didn't the group of doctors sit down?

They didn't want to be sitting docs.

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Akiva Lane
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What psychiatric tool is similar the noses of hippies?

Hip noses.

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What did Beverly say to the nut platter?

You're all nuts!

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Akiva Lane
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When Marsha told her husband on the phone that she was late, why did he call the police?

She said she was being held up.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did they come up with the phrase 'The Fastest Gun In The West'?

They wanted a slogan for a fast gun.

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Why did Marla always start walking with her right foot?

She wanted to put her best foot forward.

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Akiva Lane
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What kind of art do father's like?

Pop art.

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Akiva Lane
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What would be the result if you used incense made from mushrooms?

A mushroom cloud.

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Akiva Lane
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What is the opposite of an 'out voice', and what must be done with it?

An invoice, and it must be paid.

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Akiva Lane
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How do you talk to a pigeon?

Using pidgin English.

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What is it called when people hold that only their belief system is valid?

Pious bias.

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