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What kind of tea always tells the truth?

Honest Tea.

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How is a newspaper similar to a flooding river?

For a newspaper the news is current, with a flooding river the current is news.

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How do you describe a fantastic egg?

Egg-cellent, egg-ceptional, and egg-stroadinary.

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What do you call a delicatessen that specializes in lox?

A lox smith.

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What was Pandora guilty of?

Out of the box thinking.

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Why did Sam look online for a site that sold scratch?

He wanted to build things from scratch.

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What did pregnant Emily and the library book she was reading have in common?

They were both due in September.

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Why is a pet lusion that seems to be sick not really sick?

Because it's an ill lusion.

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What being always acts and feels lousy?

The louse.

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Why didn't Gary want to walk too far for ideas?

Because then they would be far-fetched.

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What do you call someone who is an expert about alarm clocks?

An alarmist.

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Why is sitting sometimes difficult?

You have to sit down and sit up at the same time.

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