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What is the university in Italy where they teach everything about olives?

Olive U.

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How did Max react when his wife served fish for supper 6 days in a row?

He said, "There's something fishy about this".

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Why did Jim and Beth take one evening a week from their family life to eat dates?

Because that was their date night.

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What kind of phone do prisoners use?

Cell phones.

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What do you call a bruise that one gets from falling on Halloween?

A boo-boo.

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What did the doctor say to the sick person who was too much in a rush?

I'll be doctor, you be patient.

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Why are weddings often done under canopies?

To say that marriage is in tents.

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What is the ring called under a car where the engine engages with the wheel axel?

The engagement ring.

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How did Oedipus feel when he found out about his parents?

Oedipus wreck.

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What is the trend called where people take pieces of coal with them on dates?

Carbon dating.

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What is good motto for a gym, to encourage people to lose weight?

Let there be light!

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What was Fred's reaction when someone suggested that he become a chiropracter?

He was taken aback.

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