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How did the mouse respond when the cat invited him to play?

What's the catch?

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What was Betty's reaction when the recipe called for stirring the batter?

She kept on stirring until she went batty and stir crazy.

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Why did Beverly learn knot tying?

She wanted to tie the knot, and get married.

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Whenever Emily had an appointment, what was her hope?

That it wouldn't be a dis-appointment.

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What is news from last week called?

Olds.

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Why were the Middle Ages called the Dark Ages?

Because there were so many knights.

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What are our great-grandfathers called?

Our four fathers.

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What happens to a skunk when its source of smell is removed?

It becomes ex-stinked.

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Why did the person who smoked too much go to Istanbul on a cold day right after Thanksgiving?

Because he wanted to go cold Turkey.

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What vegetable jumps into the deep end of the pool?

The endive.

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What is similar between paying for a meal and ducks?

They both have bills.

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What is the version of Arabian Nights that takes place in Rome?

Al-Latin.

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