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What is a doctor called who takes care of stomach gas?

A fizz-ician.

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Why did the police give the suspect a bowl of beans at the edge of the table?

They wanted him to spill the beans.

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What is the prettiest angle?

The acute angle.

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What con-man conquered a large part of Asia?

Genghis Con

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Why was Bill tired driving to New York over the George Washington Bridge?

It took its toll.

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If a gun had children, who would they be?

Well, the boy would be a son of a gun.

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Why did the husband and wife enjoy scuba diving together?

They liked the feeling of being in sink with each other?

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What is a short description of what you did during the summer called?

A summery summary.

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How did the can opener get its name?

Because it 'can' open things.

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What is an expert in making signs called?

A sign-tist.

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Can a person who complains all the time be a vegetarian?

No, because he always has a beef.

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Why did Martha feel bad for her calendar?

Because its days are numbered.

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