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What did the cheese say when it was shredded?

I feel grate.

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Why did he buy his electric car with a credit card?

Because he knew that the car needed to be charged.

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How did Helvetica respond when someone suggested that she go out with Times New Roman?

He's not my type.

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What does a watch repairman have in common with turning a wheel left to right?

They are both clock wise.

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What do forests and clocks have in common?

Ticks.

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What are US Treasury Bonds called that move around a lot?

Vaga-Bonds.

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What is the letter O called when it acts strange?

A weirdo.

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What finger does a card-shark use to manipulate the card deck?

The in-decks finger.

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How did the world get its name?

Because when it spins around, it is whirled.

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When Ellie Smith married Darth Vader why did she feel things were going up?

She became Ellie Vader.

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Why did Nancy like turning on light bulbs?

She enjoyed the experience of 'seeing the light'.

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Why did the mint chocolate candies look so fresh and clean?

Because they were in mint condition.

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