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Akiva Lane
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What did Matt Silver call his new software company?

Silver Ware.

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Akiva Lane
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If bored people chose a leader, what would the postion be called?

Chairman of the bored.

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Akiva Lane
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Was there any limit to how good the costumes would be at the costume ball?

Disguise the limit.

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Akiva Lane
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What time is this?

A quarter after 5.

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After Joe's dog Spot ran away, why was his house cleaner?

Because it was Spot-less.

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What cosmetics does a woman wear when she wants to end an argument?

Make up make-up.

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Akiva Lane
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Why is a pet lusion that seems to be sick not really sick?

Because it's an ill lusion.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a tax on things that people do wrong?

Syntax.

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What is the difference between starting a new job and eating hotdogs?

With one you try to pass muster, and with the other you pass the mustard.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did Bill start working at the factory that makes incense?

Because it made sense.

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Akiva Lane
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What 5 one syllable words rhyme and are all dramatic?

Purge, surge, urge, merge, and splurge.

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What did it prove when the teacher forced the class to write a long essay?

That might makes write.

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