Pictures:

How can you help people who are suspicious?

Change the first letter of suspicious from S to A, to make it auspicious.

1778

What did Joan do after she attached her schedule to a helium balloon?

She didn't know, because her plans were up in the air.

408

Why did Beverly learn about all kinds of varieties of nuts?

She wanted to be good at identifying people who are nuts.

2990

Why did Maxine think her neighbors were squares?

Because they liked square dancing.

602

How we do know that the thumb is the strongest finger?

It's a rule of thumb.

1447

How do the bags in the supermarket feel?

They are fit to be tied.

2534

How much does marriage change a relationship?

It completely altars it.

1467

What involves running, but can take place in just the kitchen?

Running out of food.

3419

What does a baker with a high IQ bake?

Smart cookies.

40

What does this picture represent?

Mind over matter.

723

How did Marty respond when his wife accused him of drinking a fifth of whisky?

He pleaded the fifth.

1831

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress?

Congress.

298