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What did the doctor's wife say when his new practice was slow?

You just need more practice in your new practice, and you need patience for more patients.

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What Beatles song is about a bee in a vegetable garden?

Lettuce bee.

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If you take a pleated skirt, and take the pleats out, what does it become?

Depleted.

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When you add up numbers, and are amazed at the result, what is that called?

Awe sum.

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What did the mother say to get her son to stop playing video games and come to dinner?

Step up to the plate.

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Why are the Patriot missiles kosher?

Because they have fins and chew their scuds.

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How did Joe the boxer feel after being slugged in the face?

He felt very sluggish.

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How did Bob feel about his lawyer challenging the judge's decision about his slipping on a banana?

He found it appealing that his lawyer was appealing the peel appeal.

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What is it called when a homeowner tries to stop a foreclosure of his house?

House keeping.

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How did the can opener get its name?

Because it 'can' open things.

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Why is it good to limit the amount of news you ingest every day?

It's not a coincidence that it's called De Press.

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Why did Arlene find it hard to let the water out of the sink?

She found it draining.

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