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Akiva Lane
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What do you call someone who is very good at finding things?

Pro found.

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Akiva Lane
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What aunt disagrees about everything?

Aunt Tithesis

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Akiva Lane
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What is the person called who cleans the white board every day?

Chairman of the board.

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Akiva Lane
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What do you call a President that is also a dentist?

President-ist.

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What do you call a duck that is a bad doctor?

A quack.

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What can you say about an elevator's day?

It has its ups and downs.

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Akiva Lane
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When the truck spilled coffee grounds all over Marvin's lawn, what did his lawyer say?

"I think we have grounds for suing the truck company."

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the painting need to rest?

Because after a long day, it was fading.

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Akiva Lane
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Why did the singer stand on a key?

He didn't want to sing off key.

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Akiva Lane
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How did the frayed knot answer when it was asked to do something?

It said, "I'm afraid not."

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Akiva Lane
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What is the difference between a child and Shakespeare?

One is involved with play, and the other is involved with plays.

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Akiva Lane
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What does the king of England have to do with writing a successful book?

They both involve royalties.

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