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What is the owner of the chair store called?

The chairman.

2071

How do you describe that the bark of a tree doesn't taste as good as its fruit?

It's bark is worse than it's bite.

2505

How did Betty feel when the neighbor's dog barked at her whenever she walked by?

She felt hounded.

540

What is the difference between starting a new job and eating hotdogs?

With one you try to pass muster, and with the other you pass the mustard.

1887

Why does the calendar have a good social life?

It has a lot of dates.

1882

Why did Joe race Fred to the punch-bowl at the party?

He wanted to beat him to the punch.

1538

What was it like during the thunderstorm on the camping trip?

It was intense in the tents.

3179

If you can get 100 somethings for a penny today, how sure can you be that this will be the price tomorrow?

One hundred per cent.

1645

What finger does a card-shark use to manipulate the card deck?

The in-decks finger.

2105

What is the study of water faucets called?

Spigotry.

2089

What did the clock repairman say when you asked when the talking clock will be fixed?

Time will tell.

2321

If you put blue berries deep in the ground, what are they called?

Very buried berries.

2063