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Will the door squeak when it's opened and closed?

That hinges on whether it is oiled.

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What did farmer Bill Rath call the grapes that grew in his vineyard?

Grapes of Rath.

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Why don't matadors take bulls seriously?

Because they know that they are full of bull.

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Why is the centipede considered one of the strongest of insects?

It takes a while until it is on its last legs.

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What can be said about someone who buys lots of books but doesn't read them?

The person has no shelf control.

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When Joe visited Alaska, how did he respond when he was told 'Be careful about the grizzly bears'.

He said, "I'll bear that in mind".

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What was the result of Joe not having enough self-control with eating?

He found that it was a big waist.

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What happens every year in the universe?

We celebrate its universe-ary.

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Why was Jim hesitant about becoming a patient in a mental hosptial?

He wasn't really committed.

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Why did the shepherd find the sheep so heavy?

Wherever he would lead them, they were lead.

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Why should baggage with wheels not be called luggage?

Because it is wheeled and not lugged around.

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Why did Cynthia love her calculator?

Because she knew that she could always count on it.

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