Pictures:

What starts with P and ends with E and has thousands of letters.

Post Office.

956

What has a head and a tail but no body?

A coin.

975

Why did the cookie go to the doctor?

Because it felt crummy.

962

Why didn't Bill use his photographic memory?

He never developed it.

961

When Bobby threw a ball as hard as he could, why did it just come back to him?

He threw it up in the air.

989

What happened to the magician driving down the street?

He turned into a driveway.

966

What does Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common?

Their middle name.

993

Why shouldn't you write with a broken pencil?

Because it's pointless.

971

Why did the shoes cross the road?

Because the chicken was wearing them.

996

Why did Barry get heartburn when he ate the birthday cake?

He forgot to take off the candles.

963

When does Friday come before Thursday?

In the dictionary.

992

What invention lets you look through a wall?

A window.

960