Pictures:

Why did Arlene bring lipstick and eye shadow to school?

She had a make-up exam.

957

Why did the cookie go to the doctor?

Because it felt crummy.

962

What is full of holes but still can hold a lot of water?

A sponge.

967

Why did Barry get heartburn when he ate the birthday cake?

He forgot to take off the candles.

963

Why shouldn't you write with a broken pencil?

Because it's pointless.

971

What starts with P and ends with E and has thousands of letters.

Post Office.

956

What do you call a train carrying bubble gum?

A chew-chew train.

959

What does Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common?

Their middle name.

993

What did the lawyer wear to work?

A lawsuit.

969

What gets wetter the more it dries.

A towel.

979

What has a head and a tail but no body?

A coin.

975

How do trash collectors learn their trade?

They pick things up as they go along.

973