Pictures:

Why did Barry get heartburn when he ate the birthday cake?

He forgot to take off the candles.

963

What starts with a T and ends with a T and has T in it?

A teapot.

991

What did the lawyer wear to work?

A lawsuit.

969

Why shouldn't you write with a broken pencil?

Because it's pointless.

971

What is full of holes but still can hold a lot of water?

A sponge.

967

If you threw a white stone into the Red Sea, what would it become?

Wet.

994

What happened to the magician driving down the street?

He turned into a driveway.

966

How do trash collectors learn their trade?

They pick things up as they go along.

973

Why didn't Joe buy camouflage trousers at the store?

He couldn't find them.

958

What starts with P and ends with E and has thousands of letters.

Post Office.

956

Why did the cookie go to the doctor?

Because it felt crummy.

962

When does Friday come before Thursday?

In the dictionary.

992