Pictures:

What 5 letter word becomes shorter when you add 2 letters to it?

The word 'short'.

988

What is blue and smells like red paint?

Blue paint.

974

Why did Barry get heartburn when he ate the birthday cake?

He forgot to take off the candles.

963

What happened to the magician driving down the street?

He turned into a driveway.

966

What do you call shoes made of banana peels?

A pair of slippers.

970

Why didn't Joe buy camouflage trousers at the store?

He couldn't find them.

958

Why did the shoes cross the road?

Because the chicken was wearing them.

996

Why is it hard to organize a professional hide-and-seek tournament?

Good players are hard to find.

972

Why did the reporter go into the ice cream parlor?

He wanted the inside scoop.

968

What is full of holes but still can hold a lot of water?

A sponge.

967

What did the lawyer wear to work?

A lawsuit.

969

What gets wetter the more it dries.

A towel.

979